Excerpt

Ashling stared at the pale stranger before her. If she hadn’t seen a picture of him online, she never would have believed that she was standing before Devlin. He was here. Meeting him in person was something she never would have committed to unless she hadn’t talked to him on the phone first. Of course before that there had been hundreds of text messages, and emails. She had spilled her heart to his man. He had become a good friend to her. He understood everything that she told him and did not judge him. Finally he had suggested maybe they should meet for coffee. She had hesitated at first, but she knew that she had to take that next step to find out if what she thought was true. Had everything she had talked about to Devlin be real?

Now as he leaned against the door of the nearly empty coffee shop, half shrouded in shadows, Ashling knew he was even more beautiful in real life than staring at his photograph. His shoulder length hair was caught back in a ponytail. The illumination of the lights made his skin seem even paler than his photograph. A strand, escaping the binding of the elastic, played along his high cheekbones in the gentle breeze. Ashling had memorized his image, committing it to memory just in case she woke up and it was somehow gone. She stood on the corner, still in the darkness, feeling the energy of it playing on her skin, ticking her. She drew in the strength of the night letting it give her strength as it also fed her deep hunger. This man was like her. He was a psychic vampire. She licked her lips not sure if she blinked that Devlin would disappear. Her nerves were getting the better of her. Maybe she shouldn’t do this. There were so many stories of woman meeting strange men from the Internet and the women were never heard from again. She gripped the sides of her skirt wiping her sweaty palms in the fabric of her skirt. She sucked on her tongue ring, pushing it up and down inside her mouth and clinking it against her teeth. Even her toes were shaking. She’d never been this nervous before. This is ridiculous. He won’t hurt me. I’ve been talking to him now for over a year. I know him.

Yeah, but how much do you know him, Christa’s voice echoed in her mind.

Ashling pushed her friend’s voice aside. She took in a breath. More than I ever knew you before I told you what I was. And that didn’t stop you from hanging around me.

She pushed up her glasses. Car headlights blinded her for a moment. She threw up her hand to protect her eyes from the glare and withdrew father into the shadows. It was safer there. The velvet darkness concealed her even from Devlin’s eyes. Her eye teeth tingled. A slow burn began to unwind in the pit of her stomach. This was not good. It meant her hunger was unsatisfied. Even the energy of the night as she drew it in wasn’t helping. Ashling had made sure to have fed before she came to meet Devlin. Christa had allowed her to draw in some of her energy before she left. Normally Ashling liked to feed while she was asleep, but tonight she needed the energy. Her nerves must have been burning through the energy. She ran her tongue over her teeth willing the hunger away. At times like this, when her hunger raged it felt as if she had real fangs. Maybe like she was a real vampire. Of course that was ridiculous.

Smoothing the fabric of her skirt, one more time, she stepped into the dim light of the café. When she did, Devlin wasn’t there. She spun around. Shit. He must have thought I wasn’t going to show. Anger and regret washed over Ashling. Her chance had been blown of meeting her online friend. He had disappeared into the night. Maybe it was all my imagination. Maybe I hadn’t really seen him.

A deep laugh erupted next to her ear, a velvet purr she wasn’t sure came from a human throat. Ashling spun around. In the darkness was Devlin. He now leaned against the telephone pole staring straight at her. A wide smile spread on his sensuous lips. She stared at him now truly seeing how the smile made him even more handsome than the dark brooding photo he had sent her. A row of silver hoops hung in both of his ears climbing up to the top. His eyes were dark and smoky, surrounded by long onyx lashes. A slight sprinkling of stubble ran along his chin. In his picture, his face had been angled down so she hadn’t seen his face that closely, but she had known it now.

“Devlin?”

“Ashling.”

Her throat went dry. She struggled to find the right words even in greeting. Here was the guy, her savior, sometimes, who had listened to her and helped her through the horrible boughs of hunger she’d had, the depression, and the rejection she’d experienced over the past year. It wasn’t easy being a psychic vampire in the world. Most of the populace thought she was insane for being what she was, but when she did find the small niche to belong to, her whole world had opened up. She had discovered kindred souls among the online communities. There was always the possibility they were yanking her chain, but she was pretty good at reading people. Just as she was the first time she had gotten a personal IM from Devlin.
***

Ashling remembered it like it was yesterday. She had been browsing some threads on a message board. Her little icon showed she was online and was accepting instant messages. Devlin’s had popped up. She almost ignored it, but there was something in the way he phrased his question that was unlike any others she had come across and it intrigued her. The little window had popped up. His icon on the forum was nothing more than a smiley face. Most of the icons, like hers, reflected something of her dark personality. Hers was a little picture of one her Living Dead dolls, Lilith to be exact. The smiley face should have turned her off, but staring at the blinking cursor while he waited for a response, Ashling studied his introduction question. It read:
Are you happy, Ashling?

Was she happy? What a crazy question to ask her? Of course she was happy. What a smart-alecky question to ask her. Her fingers poised on the keyboard of her laptop ready to make some snide reply, but it question echoed through her thoughts. Was she happy? She had a boyfriend. She was keeping the hunger at bay. She had a job that she liked her roommate was good. There were no problems in her life save for the mother who had disowned her because she had gone all crazy born again Christian on Ashling and thought her daughter was the spawn of Satan, but Ashling was dealing with that.

So she typed her response. Most of the time.

What about right at this moment? If you could capture it, freeze it, would you be happy?

Yes, she replied, but she felt the doubt in her mind.

There was a pause almost as the person on the other end of the IM was laughing. A low chuckle echoed through her darkened bedroom. She was hearing things. She knew that. It was her imagination giving the crazy guy she was talking to a personality.

I’m not so sure about that.

Why can you make me happy?

I don’t know. I was only posing the question. I like to make people think.

Ashling snorted when she read the response. He head certainly made her think. Well, are YOU happy?

Of course. I’ve just met you.

Blood rushed to her cheeks. Why was she blushing when she didn’t even know this guy from a hole in the wall. He could have been a depraved serial killer for all she knew. Well that’s nice of you to say, but you don’t know me.

But I want to know you.

Well I don’t want to know you. Ashling closed the lid of her laptop shutting off the contact with the mysterious IMer. For the rest of the day, their small conversation stuck in her head. Even while she was at work pouring drinks. The band on stage couldn’t take her mind off her conversation. When she had gotten home that night, exhausted, smelling like cheap bear and cigarettes, she dared open her laptop. The little white box had still been there, waiting for her to reply. She shook her head and closed the computer again. If the guy really wanted to talk, then he was going to have to wait until she had showered and gotten a little shut eye.
***

“Are you daydreaming?”

Ashling blushed that she realized she had been staring at Devlin and completely turned him out. She looked away and shook her head. “Sorry.”

“No need to be sorry. I never took you for someone that daydreamed. You’ve always been so down to earth when we talk.” She sensed a hint of annoyance in his voice. She didn’t blame him considering he had been the one to go out of his way and meet her. Devlin lived a few of hundred miles or so away in New York while she was in Boston. They had arranged the meeting a few weeks ago when he had some free time and she was off for a few days.

She shook her head. “I’m not really. I was thinking about the first time we met. Well…when you IMed me and asked me if I was happy.”

“Are you?”

“Yes.”

He smiled this time. Amusement lit up his smoky eyes. The grin made his face even more attractive. Ashling bit her lip harder, this time tasting blood. She didn’t need to fantasize about Devlin. Evan and she had been dating for over a year now. They were good together. He was a normal looking college student, but underneath his Polos and khakis there was a rocker with some outrageous tattoos. Ashling hadn’t told him about her being a psychic vampire yet. He thought she was only interest in vampirism. Evan hadn’t been too happy when she told him that Devlin was coming out to meet with her. She got that, but told him he had nothing to worry about. She and Devlin were only friends.

“Come on, why don’t we go inside. It’s getting a little chilly out here.”

She nodded, heading toward the door of the café. Grabbing for the door, Devlin got it first and held it open for her. Blood seared her cheek as her face hurt from blushing so hard. She’d had butterflies in her stomach on the subway ride over, but those fluttery little insects had morphed into dive bombing hawks, churning her stomach. There was no reason to be nervous around Devlin. She ducked inside glad that the inside of the café was dim. There were lots of shadows with nooks and crannies where she can hide, especially upstairs. They walked to the counter and ordered. She got a hot chocolate with extra shaved dark chocolate on the whipped cream. Devlin ordered peppermint tea. He didn’t seem the type who went with only tea. She assumed he was a hardcore kinda guy who drank his coffee black. They said nothing as Devlin followed her up the winding staircase. Her favorite spot was open, next to the window, in the corner where she could look down upon the street and watch everyone passing by. Sometimes she would wonder what they were rushing to. Tonight she paid the bustling street no mind. She was too enamored with having Devlin in the flesh. Part of her wanted to reach out and touch him, fling her body against his to feel he was solid. She hadn’t. And he hadn’t made any move to touch her either. Devlin slid into the chair across from her careful for not even his boot to touch her knee under the small table.

Ashling poked at the dark chocolate slivers with her spoon not able to meet his eyes yet. She tried to keep her hands steady while she did. What can we talk about? I’ve told him all my secrets. He knows so much about me. Even more than what I’ve told Evan. He even knows about some of the sexual things I’ve done. Devlin could be my best girlfriend. She tried to put down her spoon gently on the rim of the saucer, but with her shaking hands she dropped the spoon as it clattered and spattered her with hot chocolate droplets. “Shit,” she muttered. Her right was started to twitch from the stress of the meeting. This shouldn’t have been so difficult. Ashling grabbed a napkin, dabbing at the spots on her cheek and then on the table. Devlin’s hand shot out. His fingers landed on the white napkin pinning it to the wooden surface. There were still centimeters between them and he wasn’t touching her.

“Ashling, focus.” His voice was controlled. She dared look into his eyes. They smoldered, reaching into her soul and capturing her. She drew in a breath nearly choking on it the air when she gulped it into her throat. The heat from his fingers brushed against her flesh. His energy, his aura, bumped against hers enticing her hunger. The temptation to pierce his aura and drain is slowly, savoring it, pressed on her mind. Her teeth ached again. His gaze held her, but she regained control and finally looked away from him.

“Sorry, Devlin. I’m normally not this discombobulated when I meet new people.”

“I don’t bite, Ashling.”

She laughed. “You could if you wanted to.” Devlin was a psychic vampire like her. That was the whole reason she had started talking to him in the first place. He also professed on drinking blood from time to time from various safe donors, but he mostly got by with energy like she did.

Devlin smiled, flashing his perfect white teeth. His canines were longer than normal giving him natural fangs. “You’re absolutely correct. I could bite if I wanted to, but there’s no one appetizing in here at the moment. Except you, of course.”
Ashling snorted. “Now I know you’re lying.”

His face grew serious. His eyes darkened. “I’m not kidding. You don’t give yourself much credit. I’ve been typing to you for over a year now. You always come off as this cocky, self-sufficient woman who has her shit together. Maybe I was wrong about you. They do say meeting people in person can squash the ideas of what we have of them in our minds. Do I have the wrong idea?” He drew back in the chair, crossing his arms over his chest, putting up his guard again.

Ashling closed her eyes, gathering her wits. His words stung. She didn’t want him to get the wrong impression. Sure she was freer to talk on the internet because there were no walls, no inhibitions. Fantasies were created and enacted through chat rooms or on-line games. She didn’t want Devlin to be disappointed for coming out here and meeting her. A sudden chill wrapped around her spine from the draft in the window. She opened her eyes and stared down at the passing pedestrians. There were near Harvard Square, only a few blocks from the illustrious college. Most of the walkers were college students. Most of them lived a normal life. They didn’t know what it was liked to be plagued day by day, with an incessant burning raging through their veins. They didn’t believe in vampires. They focused on their term paper, their grades, and not if they could last the night surrounded by a hundred or so people that pressed on your shields. Each mind, each aura, was like nails on her flesh. On the nights she was particularly pissed off, she could barely stand to be around anyone. Sometimes Evan thought she was anti-social, but he didn’t know the half of it. With Devlin, she had been able to confide everything. Now he was questioning his judgment. Why had he come out there? Why was he wasting his time on a girl that he thought he knew and was now acting like a total ditz?

“You’re not wrong, Devlin. Sometimes, being like I am, like we are, I forget that I am still a person. I haven’t been bullshitting you all these months on the computer.” Ashling switched her gaze from the window and met his. She only wished she could read his eyes. They were so cold at the moment. His whole face was set. “I’m sorry if you thought that. Look, I’m ecstatic that you came all the way out here to meet me, but it’s not like you’ve ever told me what you’re like in person either. We’ve talked on the phone, yeah, but that doesn’t mean that I get to watch your expression when you talk. Have you been jerking me around this past year?” Now it was her turn to sit back in her chair and cross her arms over chest, mirroring him. She watched and waited.

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